moving out... lock, stock and two streaming nostrils.
moving out... lock, stock and two streaming nostrils.
Member since:08.12.2001
Reviews:123
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Call it arrogance. Call it stupidity. Or perhaps attribute it to the death of the wonderful Alexander Walker, without whose expert guidance I am left floundering on a sea of cinematic confusion. Whatever it is, it amounts to me being convinced that it's worth seeing a film that has been universally panned since I might like it after all... or maybe not.
Actually, let's be fair. It's not that I didn't enjoy myself watching The League of Extraodinary Gentlemen, it's just that enjoyed myself for almost entirely the wrong reasons...
CAST
Allan Quartermain SEAN CONNERY Dorian Gray STUART TOWNSEND M RICHARD ROXBURGH Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde JASON FLEMYNG Tom Sawyer SHANE WEST Capt. Nemo NASEERUDDIN SHAH Mina Harker PETA WILSON Rodney Skinner TONY CURRAN
Written by JAMES ROBINSON (Cyber Bandits) based on the comic books by ALAN MOORE and KEVIN O'NEILL
The camera slowly backs away from the 20th Century Fox logo as it degenerates into ruin, and sweeps down through the streets of turn-of-the-century London (not this one, the last one), past the crumbling brickwork and clanking gutters as pieces of rubble thunder down to distant explosive rumblings... then the story appears, filling us in on the impending war in the British Empire in this year, 1899, with the development of new weaponry, the words hanging in mid-air so that as the view descends, chimney pots rise up to obscure them... then it begins, with a tank, crashing through the walls of the Bank of England...
There's a new supervillain in town. He wears a mask to hide hideous disfigurement, and calls himself the Fantom ("How operatic," says Quartermain). His plan is to hasten war, so that he, in possession of extremely advanced technology, can become the ultimate arms dealer. Suddenly, the British government are very concerned, and in a bid to contain the impending disaster, recruit the League and their unique superpowers to protect a conference of delegates from each of the European nations, whose gathering the Fantom (sic) is only too willing to disturb...
The film begins beautifully. The set-piece I outlined above is smooth, slick, funny, a little enigmatic: all the right elements to drop you firmly into a rollicking comic book story. I really enjoyed Spider-Man and I'm a huge fan of the X-Men franchise, believing that comic books do lend themselves incredibly well to the medium of cinema. But we all
know that it's all down to a good story in the end, and this, unfortunately, is what the League are lacking.
First, there's the matter of the unbelievably clunky script. Whilst some of the dialogue is quite witty, usually that given to Dorian Gray, most of it is really very poor and obvious, with some truly dreadful one-liners. When Allan Quartermain, the famous hunter, adventurer and leader of the League (for no good reason I can see, it should be Nemo in my opinion, and apparently the original leader was Mina...) finally impales the man he is fighting on a rhinoceros horn, and the Union flag hanging on the wall drops down to engulf the victim, he quips "Rule Britannia". On James Bond, that might have been cool, here it seems rather snide and unpleasant, not to mention pretty goddamn obvious. Perhaps some of the power of the script was lost in the delivery (we'll get on to the performances in a minute), much of it was, I think, not that great to begin with. But it's not just the dialogue. The plot, whilst having a bloody good stab at being convoluted, is easy enough to follow, but rather stupid. The grand denouement, and discovery of the identity of the villain, is rather interesting (for reasons I can't reveal for fear of spoilers!) but as for the rest of it... who cares who's going to betray who? They try to make it interesting by pointing out that they all have a chequered past: Mina, it turns out, did NOT escape the clutches of Count Dracula without one of him infamous hickeys, Allan failed to protect his son on a mission, and Rodney Skinner, the Invisible Man, is a thief (he stole the process to make him invisible, for a start, since a quibble with HG Well's estate put paid to using the OTHER invisible man, who is, apparently, dead). The most pathetic attempt at highlighting Captain Nemo's mysteriousness has to go to Mina, commenting on the fact that he worships Kali, the goddess of death... er, so what? You ARE the living dead, woman! Working on the Captain Jack Sparrow theory that you can always honestly trust a dishonest man, we might be surprised that there is a traitor. But then given that they're all a tad dodgy, are we really going to be particularly surprised whoever it turns out to be?
Anyway, enough of that strand before I give too much away, just in case you suffer from the same condition I do, and don't believe anyone else's opinion and have to see it for yourself! Moving on to characters and performances.
It's interesting that apparently some of the characters here do not appear in the comic or have been changed in some way. The only one of these I am assured is a new addition to the crew is Dorian Gray (if I'm wrong, do correct me). This is rather ironic as he is far and away the best thing in it. Stuart Townsend is an annoying, arrogant, surly little bugger who was dropped from LOTR for being far too big for his boots and I don't like him. But every one of these characteristics, married to a heavy dose of rather masculine campness, means that the Dorian Gray he produces is interesting, amusing and beautifully pitched. Even his dreadful one-liners are given a clean bill of health in their delivery: shot full of holes, the immortal Dorian stuns the man who brandished the machine gun as the bullet holes heal before his eyes- "I'm complicated" he explains, with an arch little moue of campness... that could have been terrible, as it was, it did elicit a laugh, even from me. There is a sense of concealed, violent masculinity beneath the effeminate exterior, and it's that which allows his rivalry with Sawyer for Mina's affections to be taken remotely seriously as well as his sweeping, swishing action with his fine-bladed sword, which is really pretty good.
The other real notable is Jason Flemyng, who invests both nervous, blundering Jekyll and brutal, monstrous Hyde with a basic honesty and humanity that are pleasant and moving to watch. Unfortunately the Hyde-persona is not quite such a success on the CGI front... my friend said it looked like Flemyng was wearing a badly-constructed fat suit, and that's pretty accurate... His voice, however, is nicely changed and adapted, and it is fun to see the hulking Hyde knuckling his way along the corridors... Oh, and I ought to drop in a good word about the superb Richard Roxburgh (last seen as the oily duke in Moulin Rouge), who is underused but always brilliant.
The rest of the cast does that best it can with ill-developed characters and a dodgy script, with Peta Wilson and Shane West hanging in there admirably (about Tony Curran, who knows? His character, potentially the most interesting, ultimately has little screen time, though he seems alright). The exception is the catastrophically appalling Sean Connery. Now don't start flapping at me about James Bond, I didn't think he was any great shakes at that, either, but when an actor of such experience can't even mime pushing an invisible person out of a room without looking like an amateur at their first acting workshop, you have to worry. He invests Allan Quartermain with all the emotional range of boiled carrot... the best you can say is that since he's phoning in his performance, at least Shane West gets a chance to shine. (Although... Tom Sawyer? His superpower is apparently being American. No, honestly, you'll see what I mean if you watch it). He's dull, dull, dull. So is Naseeruddin Shah, a bit, though he's basically likeable. I suppose I should thank Connery in a way though... so busy was I laughing at him that I ended up quite enjoying myself!
So, alright, the characters and the plot aren't up to much... maybe, like Titanic, it's almost rendered watchable by the great visuals? Well, yes and no.
Norrington's direction is, I must say, slick and sparkling. It's aesthetically pleasing in terms of attractively constructed shots, but also pacy and exciting, using a lot of reflective imagery (such as Mr. Hyde, who is always in Dr. Jeckyll's reflection) and sweeping camera work that involves you in the plot much more effectively than the writing. Basically, you go away feeling that you've watched a well-constructed and attractive film, but sadly, an empty one.
The special effects are variable. The Mr. Hyde problem I've already covered (although the pulsing bursts of transformation are rather impressive), but there's also the issue of the Nautilus submarine, Nemo's contribution to the gang. Seeing it's gargantuan form rising from the sea as if no heavier than a feather gave me the impression that I was seeing a bunch of people standing in front of a blue screen... it was simply too big and grand to belong, and when it was weaving like a merry kitten in and out of the narrow canals of Venice, barely scraping a bridge or two, well, that was just stupid. Actually, don't get me started about some of the basic stupidity in this film... when things are fantastical, it's always easier to accept them with a high background of realism, and little things started to bug me in this, like people being obviously quite comfortably warm in a blizzard, and things like that... just shoddy details which ruin the whole. The explosions, particularly in the opening set piece, were stunning, however, and along with the creepily Gothic set design, and some of the wonderful costumes (Dorian and Mina, in particular), this earned the film a second star from me, the first being justified by its good direction. This is especially evident in the Asian/minimalist design of the inside of the Nautilus, which is a lot of plain, blank, white space, decorated with ornate silver carving.
Around this time I would usually refer to the soundtrack, but, to be honest, this one passed me by, being pretty standardly uninteresting, and not putting its mark, as a good score should, on the film in any way.
Overall, then, not something to waste your time seeing. What really irritated me was the incredible waste of potential here... think of the wealth of interesting characters, and all the possible plots that could have been so much more subtle and interesting than this. And then look at the rather formulaic, clumsily hacked together result, saved only from total bottom-dwelling by some great artistic merit. What's really sad is that since I have absolutely no familiarity with the comic, and am only well-acquainted with some of the characters portrayed, I should be one of the easiest people to impress. My fondness for X-Men and Pirates of the Caribbean would suggest I am easily pleased with an imaginative, sharp romp through fantasy and reality... what am shame this couldn't be another one.
So much for extraordinary gentlemen (and one lady). More like extraordinary disappointment.
Thanks for reading!
Alex xxx
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very good review. Just watching it on telly at the moment. seems ok.
earlofaldgate 14.05.2006 20:59
extra -ordinary........more ordinary than something thats ordinary - eg my special poer is that i have a submarine. never read the comic so maybe im missing something. good review though
Andyxx30 20.11.2004 14:07
A very well written and informatative review. I know some people dont like the film but I thought it was quite enjoyable A+
The heroes of 1899 are brought to life with the help of some expensive special effects ... more
inThe League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. From the pages of Victorian literature come Captain Nemo, Dr Jekyll (and his alter ego Mr Hyde), Dorian Gray, Tom Sawyer, th...
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The heroes of 1899 are brought to life with the help of some expensive special effects ... more
inThe League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. From the pages of Victorian literature come Captain Nemo, Dr Jekyll (and his alter ego Mr Hyde), Dorian Gray, Tom Sawyer, th...
Postage & Packaging: £1.21 Availability: Usually dispatched within 1-2 business days...
The heroes of 1899 are brought to life with the help of some expensive special effects ... more
inThe League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. From the pages of Victorian literature come Captain Nemo, Dr Jekyll (and his alter ego Mr Hyde), Dorian Gray, Tom Sawyer, th...
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Oct 18th, 2003
(Oct 21st, 2003)
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