moving out... lock, stock and two streaming nostrils.
moving out... lock, stock and two streaming nostrils.
Member since:08.12.2001
Reviews:123
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Yo ho yo ho… you know the drill. Well, you do if you’ve ever ridden on Pirates Of The Caribbean, perhaps not one of Disney’s most thrilling rides (I’m a wuss), but definitely one of the most imaginative and enjoyable. So naturally, the only way to beat sailing through a storm to reach an island full of marauding pirates is to see someone else do it on a much bigger and better scale!
CAST
(Captain) Jack Sparrow JOHNNY DEPP Will Turner ORLANDO BLOOM Elizabeth Swann KEIRA KNIGHTLEY Captain Norrington JACK DAVENPORT Captain Barbossa GEOFFREY RUSH
Directed by GORE VERBINSKI (The Ring, The Mexican)
So here’s the plot. Elizabeth is a young girl with a little secret. Quietly in love since childhood with Will Turner, whom she saw rescued from the aftermath of a pirate attack and who is now a blacksmith, is stuck in a life of corsetry, with a pleasant but ineffectual father (Jonathan Pryce) and the attentions of upright Capt. Norrington. She’s also in possession of a rather odd pirate artefact, discovered on young Turner during his rescue. Cue her kidnapping, the involvement of a mysterious pirate called Jack Sparrow ("CAPTAIN Jack
Sparreh") and a ship called the Black Pearl, manned by pirates under a truly horrifying curse, which only a human sacrifice can lift...
This is a great film. I can honestly say it’s been a long time since I enjoyed myself so much at the cinema. Johnny the-amazing-non-ageing-man Depp’s renegade pirate captain is absolutely hilarious, the drunk, camp, Keith Richards of the seven seas, complete with comedy accent. He pairs up beautifully with the soft earnestness of Orlando Bloom (watch out for his impression of Depp which he insisted go in the film) and Keira Knightley ably compliments both. Although she could easily be background noise in a film with such a talented cast, it’s only in her scenes with the brilliant Geoffrey Rush that the screen is completely whisked away from her. However, with her odd attractiveness and the fact that, thankfully, she’s not required to artfully display her bosoms (it’s Disney, you know) all the time, plus a feisty presence and a strong voice, she hangs in there. Still, there’s no doubt the film belongs to Rush and Depp, the latter’s kohl-eyed grubbiness somehow being surprisingly sexy and the former adding the necessary touch of horror and doing a very good line in pirate “arrrgh”s. And while we’re on performances, look out for The Office’s Mackenzie Crook (remember Gareth?) among Barbossa’s snaggle-toothed ranks. Sadly overlooked in all this is Jack Davenport. Given the most boring part and least funny lines, it’s amazing that he still emerges as likeable and human, and the great story prevents him from being sidelined into being a panto villain. Geoffrey Rush IS a panto villain. And the very best one I’ve ever seen.
Aside from the brilliant performances, the script is genius. Pitched at exactly the right point between an action film and a comedy, it’s genuinely funny and warm-hearted. The twists and turns are not unpredictable, but they don’t have to be because they are carried off with such panache and, more importantly, with a sense of humour. The cast is clearly having a whale of a time, the direction is sharp and enthusiastic without being unnecessarily flashy and getting in the way. This is also so much better than the last Verbinski offering I saw, The Mexican (far too clever-clever, I actually left the cinema). To top it all, the obvious chemistry between all the leads on screen is really inviting. Even the bad guys are such a classic bunch that you’re not sure you’re rooting for the other side… except that Depp is on the other side, and if you haven’t been totally seduced by him within the first ten seconds of his appearance on screen, then you may as well get up and leave now. He entirely encapsulates the feeling of the film- utterly silly in the best possible way. The visual gags are pure Disney- it’s almost like watching an animated film come to life (except for the lack of polka dot boxers that seem to make an appearance in every Disney film…). For those of you who have visited the ride, in California, Florida or Paris, watch out for little set-ups from the ride that make an appearance on the pirate island where Sparrow and Turner collect a crew- the woman teasing a pirate with her skirt, the recumbent pirate under the beer barrels, etc.
The special effects are also great. They're high-tech enough to be realistic - anyone who's seen the trailer will know the kind of skeletal thing I'm referring to- but camp enough to be gruesomely funny, and not too distractingly computerised. They fit perfectly with the modern attitudes in the period setting.
And speaking of period setting, the costumes are pretty good too- some overblown swishy dresses for Knightley and a headscarf, beads and hat combination for Depp, with his Indiana Jones-like devotion to his headgear.
This really is the ultimate adventure film. Kids will love it because it’s loud, irreverent and there’s plenty of physical comedy, teenagers will swoon over Bloom, Canterbury’s most beautiful son, and adults with any access to their inner child ought to be laughing merrily and wondering to themselves why, when they never fancied Johnny Depp before, his Keith Richards-meets-Cleopatra look should be attractive… sorry, ahem.
Best of all, the classic Pirates song, which is played almost throughout the ride, makes several appearances here, so I think we should all join in for a chorus:
Yo, ho, yo, ho, a pirate’s life for me…
Oh, just me, then. Oh well.
Certificate 12A, no idea how long it is because I was enjoying myself far too much to notice. Aren't I nice? I looked it up- 143 minutes. Seems like less.
Thanks for reading, Alex :)
How helpful would this review be to a person making a buying decision? Rating guidelines
Production Year: 1964 - Action/Adventure - Director: Cyril Endfield - Original Language: English - Classification: Parental Guidance - Starring:Stanley Baker, Jack Hawkins, Ulla Jacobsson, James Booth, Michael Caine, Nigel Green
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Production Year: 2002 - Action/Adventure - Director: Vincenzo Natali - Original Language: English - Classification: 15 years and over - Starring:Lucy Liu, David Hewlett, Anne Marie Scheffler, Joseph Scoren, Matthew Sharp, Jeremy Northam
really enjoyed this film even though at first i didnt really think i would. Johnny Depp is GORGEOUS though!! Em xxx
BNibbles 28.09.2003 09:38
All good clean fun - enjoyed it immensely myself, and found myself looking for little tableaux straight out of the Disneyland ride of the same name. My favourite line: 'The Pirate Code? Well, it's more a set of guidelines really.'
franproc 13.09.2003 18:37
I thought this was the best film I'd seen for a long while, largely down to the beautiful Johnny. What do you mean "surprisingly" attractive - bloody gorgeous and I would kill to be out there on the Black Pearl with him.
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Aug 9th, 2003
(Aug 11th, 2003)
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