Legally Bland
 Dec 31st, 2002
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None
Disadvantages:
Too many to mention
Recommendable:
No
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Member since:07.08.2000
Reviews:7
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Review rated by 21 Ciao members on average: very helpful 
OK. I'll be honest with you from the start. I'm a bloke in my late 20's, into martial arts, beer and Nine Inch Nails (the band, not the things you buy at the ironmongers). So what was I doing watching what any self respecting male could only refer to as a chick-flick? well, you see, I have a wife... ...Yes, she made me watch this film, and I may never, ever forgive her...
Don't get me wrong, I'm not against the chick-flick as a genre! I've also watched teen movies in the past that have had me nearly wetting my pants with mirth, but Legally Blonde just left me cold (and the wife wasn't impressed either!) A shame, as I have to admit that Reese Witherspoon absolutely acted her socks off, but just couldn't lift this dire movie out of the dung heap. So, how bad is it? Well, where shall I start? So very many options... Shall I begin by telling you all about the dreadful script? The terrible acting? The stereotyping? The lack of continuity... Shall I go on? Yes, I think I probably shall...
To cut a (very) long (and tedious) story short, the premise behind this dreadful excuse
for a film is that Elle (played by the lovely Reese) is your stereotypical blonde bimbette, think Alicia Silverstone in Clueless, double the dimness and you’re about there! Elle is dating Warner whom she believes is going to propose to her, but instead he tells her to sling her hook, she’s not clever enough for him, blah, blah, blah... Elle decides to win him back by proving just how clever she really is, so applies for Harvard to study law. Thing that really got me about this bit is she wants to prove how clever she is, so sends the Harvard selection board a video of her in a bikini! Hm, now what was that I was saying earlier about stereotyping? Bored yet? Believe me, you will be.
Take every single predictable teen-movie moment you’ve ever seen, jumble them together to create a new film and you can guarantee it’s going to be more entertaining than this pile of drivel. You may think I’m being too harsh, that as a bloke I can’t possibly understand the subtleties of the film, but believe me the only subtle thing about Legally Blonde is… hang on a minute… there must have been SOME subtle moments, clever little tricks you only think about afterwards, erm, nope, not one! Not a single genuine, witty, clever second in this film. Oh, don’t get me wrong, there were some funny moments, but they were all of the slap-stick variety and totally predictable every time. It’s not even that I expect a teen-movie to challenge me, but is asking for simple entertainment too much? I’ve been pretty wary of teen movies in recent years, but some little gems like Clueless, Never Been Kissed and Ten Things I Hate About You made me drop my guard a little, loosen up and start to believe that I may still be able to enjoy these films now my teens are way behind me. Unfortunately, Legally Blonde has been a major setback! The film is dull, banal, predictable and totally lacking in charm. It isn’t even that I expect a film of this ilk to be believable, but come on, (I’ll have to be careful how I word this so I don’t spoil what passes for a plot for anybody still wishing to see this rubbish) would you take everything EVERYBODY told you at face value? Can the girl who takes a lorry load of stuff to college with her really take it all home again in a sports car? I know it’s meant to be escapism, but even so…
The script is so poor that there is no rhyme or reason to any of the major events in the film. The whole thing is just a mish-mash of unfulfilled ideas and promising plot lines left hanging in mid air. Events in legally blonde are ridiculously contrived, so many things happen for absolutely no reason other than to keep the story moving along that it's plain ridiculous! Not sure what I mean? Well, what I’m trying to say (and not succeeding so far) is that everything in this film is totally “convenient”, we are only shown what is absolutely necessary to keep the plot moving along, not a smidgeon more. This, you would think, would be desirable for a teen-movie, you know, teens are all a bit thick really, short attention spans and the like (not MY opinion, just what I believe the movie makers must believe) but, basically, the result of the above is that the characters in this film are completely one-dimensional. Characters aren’t developed at all so I found that I really didn’t care if Elle saved the free world or died in a hideous mascara accident. To sum up, watch this film if you want to, I know there are lots of other people out there who found it refreshing, entertaining and even interesting (though how they managed that I don’t know) just don’t expect great things from it. This is not going to be a classic, but could provide some light relief if you can leave your brain at the door, I guess!
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![Legally Blonde [DVD] [2001]](http://picnica.ciao.com/uk/78531096.jpg)
04.12.2004 01:12
I doubt i'd even remotely enjoy this film.
26.01.2004 13:33
Haven't seen this yet, don't think I'll bother unless we're desperate for something to watch, thanx :)
13.04.2003 00:22
I just watched this and Luke Wilson is so cute in this