Jackass - The Movie (DVD)

...to be “the team of Jackass discover evil land developers want to build a min-mall on their skatepark, so team up and devise a cunning plan to foil them/raise money to buy the skatepark”. Nah. This is merely a cobbled together bunch of “too outrageous for TV” moments. With all the swears left in.

***THE INCREDIBLE BULK***

So instead of a well-scripted comedy tour-de-force, we are left with a tawdry farce – or at least ...
...the Jackass show, you will know it is simply a series of public pranks and footage of grown men (most pro skateboarders, some hopeless skateboarders). What sets this above a purchase of the video release is the handy-dandy DVD chapters, which means you can skip right to your bestest bits.

Hence one can avoid such dross “the big cone” (Jason “Wee Man” Acuna gets under an oversized road cone and walks around a bit) and enjoy such wince-inducers ... more

There’s a bracelet that some of you god-fearing types may be familiar with. It reads “WWJD?” which stands for “what would jesus do?” Well, I’m about as god-fearing as a halibut (and even if god existed, why would you fear your creator? Let’s not get into that right now…). So I tend to go by the rule of thumb “WWBHT?” – “what would Bill Hicks think?” As a stout defender of quality in all things televisual, I’m unsure as to whether Mr Hicks would have approved of men injuring themselves on the idiot tube for the amusement of the MTV generation. And I would tend to agree that on an intellectual level, this a bit like a dog egg in the cultural bolognese.

So thank crivens they made a movie…now his argument is rendered useless! Sort of!

***THE PLOT***

There is none. Oh come on, like you thought it was going to be “the team of Jackass discover evil land developers want to build a min-mall on their skatepark, so team up and devise a cunning plan to foil them/raise money to buy the skatepark”. Nah. This is merely a cobbled together bunch of “too outrageous for TV” moments. With all the swears left in.

***THE INCREDIBLE BULK***

So instead of a well-scripted comedy tour-de-force, we are left with a tawdry farce – or at least a fragmented version of one. If you are familiar with the Jackass show, you will know it is simply a series of public pranks and footage of grown men (most pro skateboarders, some hopeless skateboarders). What sets this above a purchase of the video release is the handy-dandy DVD chapters, which means you can skip right to your bestest bits.

Hence one can avoid such dross “the big cone” (Jason “Wee Man” Acuna gets under an oversized road cone and walks around a bit) and enjoy such wince-inducers as “the muscle stimulator” and “golf course airhorn” – two of my favourites. Including credits, you get 40 chapters of skits, and rewatchability is assured. Far better than the infinite repeats MTV used to rely on to pull ratings.

If only there were more to say about the main feature – you will laugh out loud, cringe – all the two emotions possible whilst watching Jackass really. And the soundtrack is typical of the series – Ramones, CKY and the like. So why bother shelling out for the DVD?

***HERE BE EXTRAS***

Oh my, yes. Let me run through them all one by one, like a hurdler who is scared of leaping.

+ Commentary #1

This features Jeff Tremaine, the director & co-creator (who now works on MTV’s Wildboyz), Johnny Knoxville (“star” and occasional actor) and the spell-checker’s pal, Dimitry Elyashkevich (director of photography, also now on the Wildboyz payroll). The trio don’t have much of worth to share (you expected Proust, maybe?), and I found myself distracted by other things like laughing at moths attacking my window and being intrigued by the vague mutterings of my next-door neighbour (who recently went bonkers) through the wall. Suffice to say, my interest was as strong as a kitten made of wet paper. This is more of a “oh, remember that bit?” kinda commentary – not that there would be much to learn about the film making process anyway. Most was shot on video from the looks of it…(actually not true…but they could have saved so much money…Hollywood corrupts!)

+ Commentary #2

This features the cast, and is a lot funnier than the above-mentioned blab-fest. Bam Margera frequently cracks up about things and the mood is a lot looser and I say again - FUNNIER. Makes you feel like “one of the boys” listening to it. As an eternal uncool-kid, such things bring comfort to my geek-like brain.

+ MTV Making Of

Not as trite as you would expect a “making of” from the MTV stable to be. Actually, a lot better than the usual behind the scenes crud-o-la drained from the dirty britches of the MTV producer’s bottom drawer. Features some clips that you can see anyway, seeing as you own the bloody movie… Talking head interviews point out the bloody obvious…and we are basically shown small segments on each of the filming locations, with related clips.

There is a fair bit fun to be had with random acts of violence towards Lance Bangs who is the editor/lead cameraman of this special. Some footage also exists of the “Jackass HQ” which is every bit as haggard as you could imagine. The rest is made up of extra footage of aborted and behind-the-scenes stunts, so this is definitely worth your time. 25 minutes of it to be precise-like. Fans of male nudity will be well served – there is a segment just for what star Dave England describes as “dirty, dirty, creepy old men.”

The only inexplicable part comes where we see star Ryan Dunn lubing up a toy car inside a condom, which is destined to be eased up his Bournville boulevard in the penultimate segment. Well, we don’t actually see said car, you see. MTV have put one of those square box things all over it. Why? We can see this in its entirety in the movie proper! Ah…standards…

+ Out-takes

Only watchable as a block, but mercifully only 6 or so minutes long. Consists of bog standard line-feck-ups, things drifting into shot, ineffectual props and so forth. Best of all is the bit with stars Steve-O and Chris Pontius trying to keep a straight face whist recording an intro segment on a beach. Also enjoyed Steve-O trying to master the supposedly simple line “yeah, dude!”

+ Additional footage

Yeah, dude! 19 clips (watch ‘em separate or in one nourishing wad) of some bits that didn’t quite make the final cut. An odd quirk occurs after watching one clip – rather than spitting you back out to the sub-menu, it just keeps playing the remainder of the footage. Ah well. Certainly bolsters the value aspect of the package, though commentaries would have been nice. “Sand vagina” is a good primer for what you can expect from the spin-off show “Wildboyz” (basically, people talking crap). “The failed ending” answers the most questions I had about some of the moments in the trailer that hinted at some grand “Mousetrap” style stunt. Shame it didn’t work. For CKY fans, “mustard assault” stars the underused Rake Yohn in a skit that will make you even more scared of chemical scientists than you should be.

+ Music Videos

Oh, hey ho…here comes the “filler”… A Jackass themed video for country-boy Roger Alan Wade’s “If You’re Gonna Be Dumb” featuring clips of the regular show and black & white footage of the Jackass guys watching Roger play with himself on a stool. Um, playing the guitar that is, not the meat-flute. Forgettable video but good song.

Second and last is the Spike Jonze directed “We Want Fun” by Andrew W.K. Nothing new stylistically from the mucky-vested longhair but a good anthem for the proceedings. And all footage of the Jackass wrap party – no promo clips of the movie! Joy!

+ Promo Spots

Arrrgh! My most hated of all spots! Except when you get one on your “gooch”. Anyhoo…9 adverts for the movie you already own. ALLOW ME TO CONTAIN MY EXCITEMENT WITHIN MY SWELLING BRITCHES. Wait a sec…it seems my none-too-subtle sarcasticness was misplaced!

Yes, these promos are worth watching, so PSYCHE! Bam’s ever-suffering parents present a series of parenting tips punctuated with movie clips – of course. Bam’s dad is an accidental comedy genius. I like. Then we get a rubbish merchandise advert, and a “wacky, postmodern” ad using the worst soundbites from the respectable press. Plus a soundtrack advert. Back on the sarcasm train! All abooooaaaarrrd!

+ Theatrical Trailer

Um…ain’t that not a promo? Me confused! Leave this alone. It will leave you angry and empty inside, like masturbating in a broken lift.

+ Cast & Crew Biogs

Nothing of interest for this humble reviewer. You can get info on other things the team has been involved in, but if I wanted to know about any of ‘em, I’d want something up to date!

+ Galleries

Last of all the features, you can sit back and see stills of the promo posters (Choo choo! Now leaving platform three, stopping at cynicism, time wastery and annoyance!). Or, more interestingly, stills from the movie (plus behind the scenes bits) with funny captions next to them. Features a very bad and overused joke about the size of oriental penises. And the obligatory clapperboard shot. Snooze.

To cap off the package, you get English subtitles (regular and “hearing impaired” flavours” and a nice front-end menu with clips of the movie on eternal loop.

Any easter eggs? Who knows, I’m far too DVD-illiterate and lazy to find ‘em.

***THE VERDICT***

All told, this is a fine addition to the comedy fan’s DVD catalogue, rewatch factor is high (as long as you’re a big immature-head like me) and the extra features make the video release seem as worthwhile as the 2-party system (sorry Amerikkka!). Make with the buying, already!

Best bought from: Your local market (£8!). Though I’m sure HMV and the like will have this at less than full price by now.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

LESSONS LEARNED:

o Some people never say “f**k”.
o American fathers are very concerned about Matchbox vehicles and their potential hiding places.
o Golf is rubbish (okay, I did know this before. I’m a fraud).
o Punches in the head can be funny when someone else is getting them.

Thanx for reading!

© P$ 2004 

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