Forest Of The Damned (DVD)

...claims that one reviewer called Forest of the Damned the best British film in years. Either he is making this up or the reviewer has appallingly bad taste in films.

A group of friends end up stranded in the middle of some woods miles from anywhere and fall victim to 'fallen angels' (naked women with dodgy dentistry).

That's the basic premise of this film. To be fair the core idea is a nice one. But its so shoddily executed. ...
...of the few things that I did think was good.

There are so many confusing elements to the whole production. Unnecessary confusion too. Where is it supposed to be set? Its clearly filmed on location in Great Britain. English number plates on cars, scenes shot in some Brtish suburb somewhere, etc. They even say they are in England at the start.

So why are they driving an Austrian VW van? Why is there a scene where they ... more

In the extras the writer/director Johannes Roberts' claims that one reviewer called Forest of the Damned the best British film in years. Either he is making this up or the reviewer has appallingly bad taste in films.

A group of friends end up stranded in the middle of some woods miles from anywhere and fall victim to 'fallen angels' (naked women with dodgy dentistry).

That's the basic premise of this film. To be fair the core idea is a nice one. But its so shoddily executed. From the writing to the direction. The lighting is one of the few things that I did think was good.

There are so many confusing elements to the whole production. Unnecessary confusion too. Where is it supposed to be set? Its clearly filmed on location in Great Britain. English number plates on cars, scenes shot in some Brtish suburb somewhere, etc. They even say they are in England at the start.

So why are they driving an Austrian VW van? Why is there a scene where they find a missing poster which has Miranda Police Department written at the top. POLICE DEPARTMENT? If this is the UK it'd be called Miranda Constabulary or something surely.

The back cover blurb on the DVD describes the English house in the woods as a Cabin! Thats one of the troubles with this film it seems to be trying very hard to be some strange hybrid of America and Britain. It doesn't know what it wants to be, or where!

Some of the music is quite good but a lot of it is very intrusive drum and base. The type of crap they seem to stick on all teen horror films these days and for me makes things near damn impossible to endure let alone enjoy

There is a mysterious chap who turns up with an Eatsern European accent and then there's Tom Savini. A great casting coupe but it's as if he has come out of an entirely different film and landed amidst this one. They could have easily found an English horror genre actor who could have played his part and it would have been more believable.

Its all very confused and incoherent. The idea of the film is good but its badly executed. Where Johannes gets his moeny fromto make these films I'll never know! I can't see anyone putting up the cash so that he could make this. Maybe he has a lot of spare pocket money that he feels the need to spend on something.

To call Johannes Roberts the UK 's Uwe Boll, director of House of the Dead and Alone in the Dark, would not be an understatement. Boll is often refered to as one of the worst directors of all time. You only have to see one of his films to know why. But if you can avoid doing that and just accept the opinion of someone who knows, you will save yourself wasting any time finding out for yourself.

The post-production dubbing is distracting too. All lines are dubbed after the film has been shot so that when you watch it you get an odd detached vibe betwixt actor and voice.

There are massively conflicting parts to this film. Some stuff is over explained while other bits are not explained at all. I've seen more coherent films starring Charles Wynford Lodge! And thats saying something!

Extras. A casting featturette which consists of footage shot by the director of girls in nothing but their panties rolling around the floor trying to look sultry, over which the guys basically go Corrrrrrrrrrr. The featurette sheds no light at all on the making of the film. It just seems to be an excuse for the director and pals to get over excited.

The best bit of the film (by which I mean the ONLY good bit) is the opening credits which seem to be shot from a cable car going over some tree tops. This looks nice and works quite well actually.

Other than that this is a mess. They shoe-horn a cameo by horror novelist Shaun Hutson in at the end. I have never read one of his books but I hope his writing is better than his acting. His latex body double has more life in it.

If you like naked demon women with pointy teeth this is the film for you. Otherwise it has bugger all to offer. Tom Savini is as good as he always is, but he's given some crap dialogue (as is the rest of the cast). So my suggestion is steer clear. It really is one worth missing! 

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