Heya, I'm Suz. Part artist, part writer, and part casual gamer. I'll gladly admit I'm a bit of a gee...
Heya, I'm Suz. Part artist, part writer, and part casual gamer. I'll gladly admit I'm a bit of a geek, so expect mostly game and movie reviews on my Ciao!
Member since:28.06.2009
Reviews:4
Drag me to hell with you? Because I'm sure that trip would have been far, far more interesting than however long time it took to see this movie. Speaking of-- I'd be willing to say this movie was at least three hours long, though it probably only felt like that.
As you've probably guessed by now, my opinion of this movie is not a terribly positive one. I don't generally like horror movies, and this movie is a perfect, perfect example of why I try to stay away from them. Now, either I could go on for a while and rant about exactly why I thought it was less enjoyable than a Hulk's slap in the face, or I could give you a simple checklist. For the sake of my own amusement, here goes:
How To Make A Forgettable Cliché Horror Movie That Adds Absolutely Nothing To The Genre In Ten Easy Steps!
Hire an actress -- make sure she's a blonde and falls squarely into the "What do I know her from again?" category. Bonus points if her character is a vegetarian.
Put her in a crappy work environment. If you can manage it, surround her with men. Any other women will be old or not conventionally attractive. If you can't manage that, give them a heavy Russian accent.
Main character has no family members left. And if you have to give her some, make them alcoholics or insane. Give her a boyfriend for support, but make sure he doesn't believe a word she says.
Throw a gypsy woman into the mix. One who can't spend ten minutes around someone without cursing them. Bonus points if she's got a glass eye or is otherwise vision-impaired.
Add a vague reference to what kind of curse it is, and scramble it around a little so that it conforms to your storyline.
Kill a cat. If you can't manage that, a goat will do. Bonus points if you manage both, and double that if the dead cat makes a comeback later on in the movie.
''In order to drive the plot further, have the main character change personalities a few times. It's OK! Normal people go from shy and bad at lying to psychopath and great at lying again all the time. In fact, make her go back to her reserved self at the end!
Do not forget the blood fountain. This is essential to your script. Lob off a limb, or maybe have your main character randomly spray copious amounts of blood from her nose or mouth. Maybe both!
Bugs. This, also, cannot be left out. Somewhere, someone must cough up a bug. The more, the better. Plant bugs elsewhere without explanation. Sinks, food, scalps you name it.
Give the audience a happy ending, only to, GASP, surprise everyone with a twist ending. Thus making the last half hour (at least!) of the movie a complete waste. Nobody saw THAT coming!
Sam Raimi, please, stop writing. Put down the pen and find something else to do while in your director's chair. Maybe knit. That's all I have to say.
How helpful would this review be to a person making a buying decision? Rating guidelines
Production Year: 1980 - Horror - Director: Stanley Kubrick - Original Language: English - Classification: 18 years and over - Starring: Jack Nicholson, Shelley Duvall, Danny Lloyd
Advantages: Apparently if you like Sam Raimi's Evil Dead films then this film will be for you Disadvantages: Bad acting, Bad story, It's supposed to be a horror, but it made us laugh. Waste of mone
DixieChick10 04.06.2009 (04.06.2009)
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Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Drag Me To Hell (DVD)
Advantages: Apparently if you like Sam Raimi's Evil Dead films then this film will be for you Disadvantages: Bad acting, Bad story, It's supposed to be a horror, but it made us laugh. Waste of mone
DixieChick10 04.06.2009 (04.06.2009)
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Ciao members have rated this review on average: very helpful
Review of Drag Me To Hell (DVD)
Sep 29th, 2009
somewhat helpful by (100%):
